I wish I could tell you that I started this year just killing my workouts and nailing my diet and never being lazy or tired or sick or inconsistent. But that would be a lie. With the exception of a couple of good weeks, 2018 has been a roiling boil of excuses and exceptions. It is embarrassing. Also infuriating. I woke up this morning just straight up mad.
I don’t like that all my new smaller clothes are a tinge uncomfortable. I don’t like that I have no energy because I haven’t been eating correctly. I don’t like being scared to step on the scale. And I REALLY don’t like feeling like a failure. This is a really real confession that I hate to admit, but hey, it is what it is. I hate that in my mind it feels like I’m giving all the doubters what they wanted to see all along. “I knew she wouldn’t/couldn’t keep it up.” *WOMP* That statement is way too much to unpack in this post, but it’s definitely something I’m journaling about privately. Homegirl has some issues. I really hate that my mood and thoughts of myself tend to hinge on how comfortable I feel in my skin.
ANYWAY. I had every intention of being 100% everything this week. However due to a variety of reason that were out of my control, that didn’t happen. So here’s what I’m telling you – I’ve made a pact with myself. All this mess stops here. I mean, I was perfect with diet and exercise for 8 WEEKS WITH A BROKEN ANKLE. I can do this.
I love my Apple Watch. I’m tied to it like I married the thing. I love that it gives you little challenges to complete every now and again. I am a sucker for pretty rewards. (Yes, I was the girl in school who wanted alllllllll the gold stars by her name. I like shiny things.) So I’m creating a Sarah Challenge.
In just over 30 days I go to Dallas for a work convention. There is a pretty good possibility I’m going to have to be fabulous in front of a whole lot of people. I don’t want to feel like this when I need to be the epitome of self-confidence. For the next 30 days I’m committing to myself to do the following:
- Close all my 3 of my apple watch rings every day.
- Lift/strength training 6 days a week (already do this when I’m consistent.)
- Auxiliary Class (barre, TRX, yoga, etc.) 2 days a week
- 100% on my macro levels. No exceptions. No cheats.
- Drop at least 5lbs of the fluff I gained over the holidays. I didn’t handle the holidays and vacation appropriately. I’ve learned my lesson. Now I need to fix it.
- Everyday identify something within me to feel confident about.
I can do this. I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again. I just need that line in the sand and the deadline to make it happen. Once I can get in the groove I’ll be just fine. No more excuses. I just can’t do it anymore.
TODAY I LOVE: the entire Drunk Elephant skincare line. GAME CHANGER.
